From bigger picture: after the end of culture revolution, the college entrance exam was resumed. Education become a symbol: the previous middle class use them to resume their position. Then from top to down, education become a tool.

I suffer excess homework since childhood, so I’m always looking forward to playing some games.

My first phone

Back in home, my mother controlled everything.

It seems like new year. My relatives comes; my aunt give me a red pocket; I used them to buy a phone.

It’s my second phone. the first was picked on the road by my mother; someone lost it. She tells me to ferign not seeing it when the owner looks for it. So we kept it; I feels guilty now - because it equals to stolen from someone. But, back then, I don’t feel anything.

Since I get that phone, I’m somewhat addicted - everything was so new to me. I was isolated from childhood - then a very boring middle school.

(It’s around my first or second year in high school.)

Enjoying the vast content, I plays games, reading online novels. Sometimes I read them overnight. My mother starts to hating phone seeing that - because it hinders my study, and study stands for everything - because the riches and the powerfuls are all from a famous school.

But in reality, it’s excess homework and cramming education. So I was very attracted by the new world.

The conflict

My mother want to limit my time spending on phone, but it didn’t work. Finally the day come - one day I’m back home, I find the phone missing. It’s been hidden by mother.

I cried and cried, but she didn’t budge. I was very sad then.

Finally, the phone rings due to the battery was out - and I find it.

Nowdays

It’s a sad memory triggerred by a recent action - I send a game console home, hoping that my little sister can enjoy games more. But my mother hides it.

It can be a misunderstanding. But she failed to understand us all along.

Other thing

Also, I sufferred from carpal tunnel syndrome all along. It’s because long writing time to deal with homeworks.

I plan to deal with it, but the future is still unknown - but there is hope.